Speech Assistance

	About Wedding Speeches		More Speech Tips
	Wedding Toasts		Speech Content
	Wedding Speech Examples

About Wedding Speeches

There are three generally accepted speeches usual to a wedding reception they are, bride's father's speech, the bridegroom's speech and lastly the best man's speech. No further speeches are required although other speeches are permissible; it is not unusual for example for the bridegroom's father to give a short speech of thanks to the host and hostess for the occasion, or the bride to have a "best woman" give a speech.

Brides Father
The brides father should be called upon by the toastmaster (or the best man) to propose a toast of 'health and happiness to the bride and bridegroom'.  Before doing so he would normally welcome the grooms parents, relatives of both families any other guests and welcome the groom to his family and say a few words about his daughter.

Bride Groom
The bridegroom replies on behalf of himself and his bride, taking the opportunity to thank his parents for there love and care during his youth, for the start they gave him in life, and for their good wishes for his future and that of his wife. He will also take this opportunity on behalf of his wife and himself to thank all those present for their gifts.

Should there be any close members of the family who could not attend the wedding because of illness, they should be mentioned and be wished for a speedy recovery.

To conclude, the bridegroom will propose the toast of the bridesmaids, and thank them for a job well done, he may also present them with a small gift as a token of their appreciation.

Best Man
It is the best man's duty to respond to this toast on behalf of the bridesmaids, his speech should be light hearted and fun. It should be the high spot of the reception and it is very often his ability to make this particular speech, with humour and interest, that is the deciding chapter on the selection of the best man. (no pressure then!)

More Speech Tips

Introduction | Preparation | Delivery

You've made it to the reception. The speeches have started. Your hands have gone all clammy and your heart is thumping so loudly you wonder if anyone can hear it. The it's your turn. 'Ladies and gentlemen, the Bride!'

There's nothing unusual about feeling nervous. I've known brides who would rather jump out of an aeroplane than stand up and address a room full of well-wishers on their wedding day. And I'm not only talking about women who've never had to make a speech in their lives. Many teachers, lawyers and cool-as-you-like businesswomen can suffer with nerves on an occasion like this. Then again, some brides manage to make it all look so easy and relaxed. How do they do it?

There are two elements to a successful speech (and one that's enjoyable for both you and the audience!) The two elements I'm talking about are preparation and delivery. Put just a small amount of work into both and you will end up wondering why you ever doubted you could do it.

Preparation

Content
- If you're unsure of what to say or what elements to include in your speech, look at those of other brides. There are a number here on Hitched. Reading what others have said can help you decide what's appropriate for you and your wedding. Other factors to consider include asking yourself: who will be in the audience? What will the Groom and Best Man already have said? How formal is the setting? What kind of 'funnies' are likely to go down well? Don't try to inject humour for the sake of it. The main thing is to be true to your personality - it's a performance, not an act.

Notes
- Professional speakers sometimes enjoy the luxury of autocue. Others have notes to remind themselves of what they want to say. Choose what suits you, but if you are a novice speaker you will probably have a more relaxed and enjoyable time if you don't read your speech word-for-word. By all means type it out that way, but refer to highlighted bits of it rather than reading verbatim. Your guests want to see your face, they want to make eye-contact with you - and that's hard when your head is buried in a piece of paper. Worse still, if you are nervous the paper may start to shake!

Practice
You may want to practice your speech, both to check length and delivery style. Get your bridesmaid to help by listening and ask her to tell you honestly how your voice sounds. To quiet? Too rushed? Women in particular sometimes find themelves going up in pitch when trying to project the voice. In fact, by deepening your voice a little you will find it carries better. Remember it's not only the size or layout of the room that determines whether you will be heard, it's also how many people there are in the room. The more people, the more you must project. Try to exaggerate every word and consonant. Imagine you're speaking to a group of lip-readers. It may sound silly to you, but it won't at all to your audience.

Before you speak

It's best to avoid excess alcohol, but make sure you have water to hand (not the fizzy variety!) and drink some of it before you stand up to speak. Don't be afraid to take a sip or two once you start speaking if you feel your mouth going very dry.

Take a couple of deep breaths. Right down to the diaphragm, feeling your whole chest and belly expanding. Yes, I know it may be difficult in that tight bodice, but getting a grip on your breathing will do wonders for disguising the outward signs of nerves.

Delivery

Be conscious of your body language right from the start. Stand with your weight equal on both feet, and look around at your audience for a few seconds before you start to speak (this is a simple trick and will make you appear very confident and at ease).

Take your time. What will seem like an age to you will really only be a few seconds to your audience. Use pauses to gather your thoughts, glance at your notes and breathe in and out (yes, it's easy to forget!)

Try to make eye contact. Take slow 'sweeps' back and forth around the room as you speak and everyone will feel included. You've no idea how powerful this technique is for winning people's attention and reassuring the audience: that's why autocue screens are placed to either side of the speaker at conferences, not right in front of them.

Think of the audience. The more you concentrate on engaging with them rather than speaking 'at' them, the more at ease you will appear and the less time you will have to worry about your nerves.

There's no need to let nerves ruin your enjoyment of the occasion. Even if you forget everything you were going to say, just remember to breathe, smile, look at the audience … and it will be fine.

For those who really want to write their own speech, there are books to help (I know - I've written one). They will also give you tips on how to deliver it, which is extremely useful whoever did the writing. For the benefit of anybody faced with the task of making a speech here are a few brief pointers on delivery:ead

Read your speech or memorise it?

Few people are willing to trust everything to memory. An alternative is to thoroughly familiarise yourself with your speech and then reduce it to a set of brief notes on cue cards. The advantage is that your speech will not sound as if it is being read word for word. But if you do decide to read it, nobody will mind.

• Practice.
  Whatever you decide - rehearse it. Then rehearse it again - until you are sick of it. That should be about right.
• Slow Down!
  What ruins more speeches than anything else is a nervous speaker going too fast. He doesn't pause to let his points sink in and doesn't wait for the laughs he wants. His audience is then so busy trying to catch what he's gabbling about that they don't have time to laugh. Oh dear - no laughs. What does our speaker do? Panics and accelerates even more. Result - disaster! Even experienced speakers get suffer this urge to speed up. Don't give in to it.
• Body Language.
  Stand up straight and look confident. Even if you are reading, look up and at your audience from time to time. Eye contact makes them feel you are talking to them, and it will help you with your pauses.
• Laughs
  If you expect a laugh - wait for it. If it doesn't come tell people they were supposed to laugh and refuse to go on until they do. That will kick start them. Don't begin again until the laughter has died down - enjoy it. Study professional comedians - you'll learn a lot.
• Interruptions.
  Enjoy interruptions, especially funny ones. They provide thinking time, and hey… people will remember it was your speech that got the laughs; they won't remember that it wasn't always your lines.
• Drink.
  Don't drink too much before speaking. You might think it helps, but your audience won't.

Two final important points to remember:

1. The audience is on your side. They want to enjoy your speech - give them the opportunity

2. If you get a totally unexpected laugh - check your flies

These basic rules will help you make a memorable presentation. If you're also working with a professionally written speech to begin with - you should be on a real winner.

Speech Content

Your speech can often be enhanced by the use of a joke, a famous quote, or a parallell drawn from an event from history.

Jokes | Quotes | The day in history

Wedding Toasts

Bride or Groom

We have been through the better and worse
(not always the better prevailed)
We've seen the richer and poorer
(the latter is most often sailed)
The sickness has outrun the health
(which often has caused much ado)
So now I pledge to you my heart,
till death do us part,
And pray all our dreams will come true!

Me got him.
He got me.
We got us.
You got that?

"Wasser macht weise
Froelich der Wein
Darum trinke beides
Um beides zu sein!"

Water make you wise
Wine makes you glad
So drink them both
In order both to be!

To the two secrets to a long-lasting happy marriage:
Here's to good sense of humor
--and a short memory!

May we never forget
what is worth remembering
or remember
what is best forgotten.

"Because I love you truly,
Because you love me, too,
My very greatest happiness
Is sharing life with you."

" I have known many,
Liked not a few,
Loved only one
I toast to you"

"May these rich blessings be your due...
A wealth of friendships, old and new,
quiet nights and busy days, time for prayer and time for praise,
some service rendered, some solace given,
and gentle peace with God and heaven."

"Drink to me only with thine eyes,
And I will pledge with mine;
Or leave a kiss within the cup,
And I'll not look for wine. --Ben Jonson

From The Parents

"The man or woman you really love will never grow old to you.
Through the wrinkles of time, through the bowed frame of years,
you will always see the dear face and feel
the warm heart union of your eternal love." -- Alfred A. Montapert

May our children be blessed with rich parents!

"It is written: when children find true love, parents find true joy.
Here's to your joy and ours, from this day forward."

"Happy marriages begin when we marry the one we love,
and they blossom when we love the one we married."

To The Grandparents

Let us raise our glasses
And then imbibe
To the splendid couple
Who founded this tribe.

General

"May your wedding days be few and your anniversaries many."

"Here's to you and here's to me,
I hope we never disagree,
But if, perchance. we ever do,
Then here's to me, to hell with you."

"I drink to the general joy of the whole table."
Shakespeare, from Macbeth

To keep a marriage brimming
with love in the loving cup-
When you are wrong, admit it
and when you are right, shut up!

"May thy life be long and happy,
Thy cares and sorrows few;
And the many friends around thee
Prove faithful, fond and true."

"A thing of beauty is a joy forever.
Here's to you, my beautiful bride."
John Keats

" To my wife, My bride and joy. "

"Never above you. Never below you. Always beside you."

" Here's to the woman that's good and sweet,
Here's to the woman that's true,
Here's to the woman that rules my heart,
In other words, here's to you."

Were't the last drop in the well,
An I gasp'd upon the brink,
Ere my fainting spirit fell,
'Tis to thee that I would drink.

"Every day you look lovelier and lovelier, and today you look like tomorrow."

"Let's drink to love, which is nothing - unless it's divided by two."

"Here's to the prettiest, here's to the wittiest,
Here's to the truest of all who are true,
Here's to the neatest one, here's to the sweetest one,
Here's to them, all in one - here's to you."

Here's to The Bride, her kisses so sweet
she makes things stand that have no feet
she lost her cherry, but that's no sin
for she saved the box that it came in

"Here's to It,
And to It again.
When you get to It,
and can't do It;
Come see me,
because I'm used to It!"

Here's to that moment of sweet repose
When it's cheek to cheek and nose to nose
For after that moment of sublime delight
It's fanny to fanny for the rest of the night

Long life and happiness - for your life will be my happiness

To the bride and groom - may we all be invited to our golden wedding celebrations

May you live as long as you like, and have all you like for as long as you live

To the bride and groom - may the roof above you never fall in and may you both never fall out

To the bride and groom - may I wish you health, may I wish you happiness, may I wish you wealth - what else more I wish you

To the lamp of love - may it burn brightest in the darkest hours and never flicker in the winds of trial

Congratulations on the termination of your isolation and may I express an appreciation of your determination to end the desperation and frustration which has caused you so much consternation in giving you the inspiration to make a combination to bring an accumulation to the population.

Live life to the fullest - remember, this is the first day of the rest of your life

To the bride - may she share everything with her husband, including the housework

Here's to the bride. May your hours of joy be as numerous as the petals of your bridal bouquet

To the newlyweds: May "'for better or worse' be far better than worse

To my bride: she knows all about me and loves me just the same

May your love be modern enough to survive the times and old-fashioned enough to last forever

Here's to love, laughter
and happily ever after.
As (Groom) and (Bride) start their new life,
Let's toast the new husband and wife!

To our best friends,
who know the most about us,
but refuse to believe it.

To our wives and lovers . . . may they never meet!

"Here's to the bride that is to be, Here's to the groom she'll wed,
May all their troubles be light as bubbles
Or the feathers that make up their bed! "

"To the man who has conquered the bride's heart, and her mother's."

"Here's to the groom, a man who keeps his head though he loses his heart."

"Down the hatch, to a striking match!"

"May you grow old on one pillow."

"Here's to the bride and the bridegroom,
We'll ask their success in our prayers,
And through life's dark shadows and sunshine
That good luck may always be theirs."

The vows have been read,
The cake has been cut;
Let's hope that (bride's name),
Don't grow a big butt!

Here's to Eve, Mother of our race,
Who wore a fig leaf in the right place.
And to Adam, Father of us all,
Who was Johnny-on-the-spot when the leaves began to fall!

"May your joys be as deep as the ocean,
and your troubles as light as its foam."

May the best of their past be the worst of their future

"Here's to marriage, that happy estate that resembles a pair of scissors: 'So joined that they cannot be separated, often moving in opposite directions, yet punishing anyone who comes between them.'"